Just Another Tuesday Night at Home

“If I did emergency medicine, I’d feel confident that if I were on a plane and they asked for a doctor, I’d be able to do something useful.”

“Whereas, if you did, say, psych … “

“Well, I’d be useful if someone were trying to hijack the plane.”

“You could be all like, ‘So you’re telling me that you want to hijack the plane. Tell me more about that.’”

“Do you dream about hijacking planes?”

“Do you really want to hijack the plane, or is hijacking planes about pleasing your distant father?”

“Does this inkblot look like a plane to you?”

“Do you hear voices telling you to hijack planes?”

“I’ll say a word, and you say the first thing that comes to mind. Hijack.”

“Is there a history of hijacking planes in your family?”

“Do you need to hijack a plane to get started in the morning? Do you feel guilty about hijacking planes? Do you get annoyed when people criticize you for hijacking planes? Have you ever tried to cut back on hijacking planes?”

“Can you spell ‘plane’ backwards for me?”

“Have you ever taken Ambien and woken up hijacking a plane?”