Luciano Pavarotti, Was 71

Pavarotti, the most renowned opera singer of our day, is dead. Out of respect, I’m not going to tell the pizza joke. But, because I’m a horrible person, here are some Three Tenors puns:

If they hadn’t charged admission, they’d have been the Free Tenors.

If they’d been smaller, they’d have been the Wee Tenors.

If they’d sung on the slopes, they’d have been the Ski Tenors.

If they had similar waistlines, they’d have been the 310ers.

If Tom Cruise had participated it would have been the Thetanors.

If they hadn’t been successful and had had to have most of their bookings on cruise ships, they would have been the Sea Tenors.

If they had been full of life force, they would have been the Qi Tenors.

Thank you, I’ll be here all week.