Too Bad Their Theme Song Has No Quotable Words

I’ve noticed that in the last few years, Simpsons characters have been popping up more and more frequently in legal hypotheticals. Homer leaves a will naming Marge, Bart, and Lisa; Lisa wants to buy a car; Bart is caught by police driving a stolen car. I suppose it’s confirmation of their omnipresent cultural status and cross-generational appeal. (If I should be so lucky as to be writing hypotheticals some day, I think I might enjoy using the names of lesser-known figures from the Simpsons universe. The pure incongruity of a question involving Disco Stu, Bumblebee Man, Mindy, and Kodos, for example, seems like the sort of absurd juxtaposition the show itself would revel in.)

At any rate, I find Simpsons names a lot less jarring than the bad puns (puns so bad it’s almost misleading to call them “bad” or even “puns”) who populate so many sample bar questions. Ohner, Bonnie Fyde, Bea Holden, Gash and Gimpy, Sellers, Byar, and Al Kaholl are some of my least favorite, but there are many, many more.