The Mike Hyun Rule

There was this guy who was on the track team with me in high school, and he had this habit of going to Burger King and eating cheeseburgers on race days. Then, predictably, when his actual races rolled around, Mike would be rolling around, too, dealing with cramps that must have been pretty heinous, to judge by his facial expressions. When he recovered enough to speak, he'd curse God, the universe, and his lot in life for bringing this pain upon him. In recognition of which, I named the Mike Hyun Rule after him. It goes something like this: there is to be no feigned ignorance of cause-and-effect when it comes to the predictable consequences of one's own actions.